Sunday, January 6, 2008

Confused? You Might Be

ISRAELI security officials are to brief President George W Bush on their latest intelligence about Iran’s nuclear programme - and how it could be destroyed - when he begins a tour of the Middle East in Jerusalem this week.

Ehud Barak, the defence minister, is said to want to convince him that an Israeli military strike against uranium enrichment facilities in Iran would be feasible if diplomatic efforts failed to halt nuclear operations. A range of military options has been prepared.
Hey! I've just realised a major software flaw in all media word processing applications. They print 'Iran' when the user types 'Israel', see there is no Mearsheimer & Walt-ian Israel lobby it's the software! When journalists are reporting on Israeli aggression the article comes out as 'Iranian aggression'. It also makes understanding the news a lot easier, we all know Israel has an active nuclear weapons program but because of the glitch we all got worked up about the 'Iranian nuclear weapons program'.

There is also an intermittent fault when sometimes 'America' is printed as 'Iran'- When the media write about Iranian influence they mean 'American influence' which makes so much more sense:- American influence in the middle east is suspected of backing dictators, puppet leaders and client regimes exporting oil to a technologically inefficient swamp of carbon horror! I'm going to have to do some thorough testing but I suspect there may be other bugs affecting media perception:-

Capitalist greed euphemistically hidden as the subprime crisis, will destroy our entire economy.

Actually prints out as- 'Britney Spears'

The invasion was specifically designed to funnel public money into private hands while impoverishing future generations, government programs for the needy can now be cut under the guise of balancing the budget WHILE at the same time spreading imperial influence in key oil producing areas which enables greater profits for transnational corporations while destroying the people of the country unfortunate enough to play host to these sociopathic power hungry ruling class parasites.
Actually prints as- 'Election '08'

Raped, flailing, sizzling burning limbs coated with pain as babies incinerate in the melted eyes of their mothers.
Prints as- 'winning hearts & minds' also sometimes- 'peace talks'

We are going to reintroduce slavery.
Prints as- 'competitiveness'

Tranquilliser
Prints as- 'entertainment' sometimes- 'beer'

Have a look around yourself and see if you notice any, it's a game the whole family can play!

3 comments:

Naj said...

Rick, you know one of my rituals is this:
I wake up in the morning, check email, news.google.com and then search "Iran" ...
interestingly, this past few days, the only news about "Iranian threat" have been disseminated by some Israeli or Jewish medium!

Beating the dead horse!

But I am very worried about what is happening in Iran's internal politics. Ahmadinejad is cornered and even the conservative parliament is opposing him, even reversing some of the STUPID decisions of the government.

The proximity of Iranian elections and American ones are not a coincidence, they are historically correlated, if we think of the Islamic revolution as something that was primarily fueled by teh first generation neoconservatives who were planning a REagan plantation.

Frankly, I am AFRAID of reading the news in Iran (and not about Iran) these days, I can't wait for this year to be over and for this Ahmadinejad to retire back to university.

Unknown said...

Then I don't know if this is good or bad-
http://www.iht.com/articles/2008/01/07/africa/tehran.php

Naj said...

Don't know.

Ahmadinejad's made a mess of a lot of internal affairs.

I would throw my support behind Khamenei camp, but then they are not democratically elected.

It's confusing. Time will tell. Parliament elections are important.